19 Things I Learned by 19.

Yikes. Tomorrow I turn twenty. I'll no longer be a teenager and I'm not quite sure how emotionally prepared I am for this... Ahem, let's put my emotions away into that dusty box in the corner where they usually reside.

In honor of the momentous occasion of becoming two decades old (almost), here are nineteen lessons I've learned thus far in my life.

1. The number of friends you had in high school meant nothing.

I had two consistent friends all throughout high school and I was so afraid that that was foreshadowing of friendships for the rest of my life. Thankfully I was mistaken; I am so blessed by the crazy amount of friends I have now. (Hi friends who are reading this! I love you {because you're reading this}).

2. Don't think you have to (or can) get through life alone.

I'm someone who struggles to ask others for help when I'm having a hard time dealing with a situation, or simply having a rough day. But I've been learning over the past few years that there is so much to be gained - comfort, truth, understanding - from being honest and vulnerable, and allowing people that you trust to journey alongside you.

3. Stop worrying about everything!

Oh man, I still struggle with this one. But it's an important lesson. In Matthew 6:(25-)34, the Bible says:

"Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

4.  Be grateful.

Start your day by thinking of three things that you're grateful for. Be thankful for simple things like pizza and iced coffee. End your day by writing a list of ten things that you're grateful for that happened that day. Thank people for something as simple as holding the door open. Be grateful for important things like the gift of salvation, grace, and unconditional love from our heavenly Father.


5. Stop looking at everyone as a "potential"!

Now, I'm not saying to stop thinking that people have potential; I'm saying stop thinking that every guy (or every girl) is someone that you could maaaaybe date and possibly see yourself marrying. Yes, that's something that's important, but don't force it. Remember that platonic friendships are totally okay!!


6. Seek joy in the smaller things in life.

Laugh at a joke longer than you "should". Be happy that you got a 58% on a test you were convinced you failed. Smile when you see your favourite chocolate bar on sale in the grocery store on exactly the day you were craving it.


7. People don't think about you as much as you think they do.

Harsh reality, I know. But it's helpful, especially when you think that everyone's going to remember that seemingly suuuuuper embarrassing thing that you did last week. Spoiler: no one remembers. Okay, well someone does, but at least it's not everyone, right!?


8. Say sorry.

Apologizing can suck, especially when you feel justified in staying mad at someone. But saying "I'm sorry" is so important! And personally, I'd prefer to lose an argument over losing a valuable relationship with someone.


9. It's all about balance.

Some days you'll wake up at 7:00AM and work out, and then you'll eat salads and drink lots of water all day. Other days you'll eat three cupcakes, half of a pizza, and you'll drink two iced capps. Both are fine, as long as you don't do the latter every day...!


10. Remember that your identity is found in Christ.

Especially on days when you're feeling completely unsatisfied with yourself, you can be reminded that your worth isn't found in how much you weigh, whether your clothes are from WalMart or American Eagle, whether you have a boyfriend (or girlfriend) or not. Your identity is solely, completely, one hundred percent found in who Jesus Christ says you are.


11. Make new friends, but keep the old...

...One is silver and the other gold. Growing up and going to college has shown me that meeting new people is awesome, but it's vital to remember to keep in touch with my friends who've grown up alongside me and supported me through everything. (I'm especially thankful for the ones who supported me even through those awkward early teenage years... yikes. Y'all are the real MVPs.)


12. Don't let fear hold you back!

If I let fear hold me back, I wouldn't be here in my third year of Bible college, studying to become a worship leader. As I've mentioned in previous posts, I struggle with social anxiety; as much as I really want to become a worship leader, it's one of the things that scares me the most! But I've been learning that it's important to face my fears.


13. Sit with your emotions.

This is something that I'm still not good at. But I'm trying. It's important to learn how to process your emotions, otherwise you'll find yourself getting super overwhelmed but you won't understand why you're feeling that way. There will be times when you're overwhelmed and there's no explanation for it. Keep that in mind.


14. You still need your parents.

It's true that you become more independent as you get older but heck, I'm turning twenty tomorrow, and I still get my mom to call the doctor's office when I'm sick to book an appointment for me. And sure, I feel super accomplished when I call a 1-800 number to talk about my credit card, but I also know that I'll still be calling my parents when I'm married and have kids.


15. Remember where you came from.

This ties in with the last one. Even when you're all grown up and moved out of the house, remember that your parents (and likely your siblings, too) were your first and biggest supporters in life. Don't let that slip your mind. Make sure you don't just talk to your family when you need money, or you're sad. Talk to them about the exciting things that are happening!


16. Try not to be dramatic.

This one speaks to my soul, so don't get offended. Someone who's close enough to me to say something like this recently told me that I used to be (slash still am) someone who can blow a situation out of proportion when it's really not that big of a deal. I'm glad that that point was made to me, because now whenever I find myself getting frustrated with a situation, I ask myself 'how big of a deal is this, really?'

17. Honesty wins every time.

Lying to someone (even just a little white lie) may mask the pain for a short time, but the other individual will be more hurt when the lie gets huge and the truth finally comes out. It sounds cliché, but it's better just to rip the band-aid off right at the get go. The other person will thank you (it may take them awhile though), and you'll thank yourself too.

18. Take your time with relationships.

I'm not just talking about romantic relationships, but take this in whatever way you want. I've learned from experience that it's so much better to take things slow. You don't have to jump right in and learn everything about someone right away; if the friendship lasts, you'll learn a whole lot about that person in the end. Take time and enjoy each moment of the relationship (be it platonic or romantic).

19. Even a brief amount of time with the Lord each morning makes the whole day drastically different.

Oh man, this one is so important! The older we get, the busier our lives (and our days) seem to be. It's vital to take time with the Lord in the morning in order to orient your day and remind yourself where your focus truly lies. I can end up finding myself insanely overwhelmed in the middle of the day and then it dawns on me that I didn't dedicate the day and everything in it to God that morning. You may not believe it but trust me, your day can change dramatically if you choose to spend time with the Father in the morning, and dedicate the day to Him.

So there ya have it. Nineteen things that I've learned up to this point in my life. Here's to getting one year older!